I am trying to vent the frustration of a housewife locked away in a world I don't want to be in. I used to be a person of interest, respect, and desire. After staying home with 4 kids and an absent husband, I have become a lost cause. For four years I have been slowly losing part of myself each day. Sacrificing a little more just to get through the day. I feel like all that is left is the crumbs of the bag of Chips Ahoy. Not good enough for anyone to want, just a little fix to curb your appetite until you can buy a new bag. After caring for my husband's grandparents full time for 6 months now, I have reached a point that I can go further into the state of doormat resemblance, or I can try to regain some of the drive and desire that I once had for my life. I am going to tell my story in these entries, I can't promise I will be very organized or interesting, but I can say that it will be all for me. I want to go back and read it all to see how pathetic I have let myself become. I don't have much interest in anything, but I'm going to try to find some, somewhere!